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So what is this T.A.T.? And why is it that in Bangkok strange Thais always send you there without you asking for it? Sagesex illuminates.

Our first visit to a T.A.T. was purely obligatory and yielded little more information than that the abbreviation stands for Tourism Authority of Thailand and that our consultant obviously wasn’t a big fan of Bangkok. He strongly warned us against staying any longer than three days in town and suggested going to Ko Samui or Ko Phangan, Thailand’s top tourist sandy beach islands, ASAP. He would love to be of assistance in booking the train and ferry tickets as well. If you shortly consult Lonely Planet you get the impression that T.A.T.’s are the only trustworthy travel agencies, since they are licensed by the government. Everyone else is supposed to be a con artist in contrast.

A few days later we do indeed decide to go south, and of course we start our journey at the local T.A.T.. We are greeted by a tall, sylph Thai lady. She seems respectable in her black/grey costume. We explain to her that we’re planning a journey to Ko Phangan, but would like to stop for a day halfway in order to make the fifteen-hour trip in two bearable stages and see a little countryside as well. Therefore we specify a small town. First she doesn’t quite understand what we want to do in this town – there’s nothing there to see for tourists and nobody even speaks English there – but she finally agrees and makes some telephone calls.

Soon enough a schedule is made. The station is best reached by taxi, namely because it is very far away. When we tell her we prefer taking the bus there she is getting nervous. The bus drivers don’t speak our language! That’s far too difficult in any case, we could never make it. We remain stubborn, show her the bus routes going there in our Lonely Planet (she never takes the bus) and eventually she even knows the rough area where one of these might leave. She’s still worried, but that’s that.

Now let’s talk business. Before she reveals the price tag for our trip she warns us: “Don’t scream, don’t shout, don’t say it’s expensive!” She keys something into the ubiquitous desk calculator and then presents the hefty figure of 7700 Baht (about €160). OK, I had expected this to go into three figures, but this appears a little out of league to both of us. Time and again we insist there must be a cheaper way. Gently smiling, as always, she explains that there is no way she could cut that price. No dice. Because out of this sum (this time she shows us 7400 on her calculator) what remains for her is just … she considers, keys something into her calculator and turns it over to us. We are faced with a fat 5000.

Silence. We exchange puzzled looks. Maybe she means 5? Or 50? Or 500? “Five THOUSAND?” Stefan asks bewilderedly. She nods approvingly. Suddenly the silence breaks. We simultaneously break into uprarious laughter. While we’re already laughing tears she tries to explain that you couldn’t buy anything for this in Europe. We barely bring out that she does not live in Europe, but then she tells us with a straight face she has to pay taxes as well. Now we almost fall off our chairs from laughing. She’s really trying to tell us that is is absolutely legitimate, a no-brainer really, for a travel agency to demand a 200% commission (As we had to find out later, this number is a rather widespread rule-of-thumb in Thailand’s travel agency scene)! Still laughing heartily we thank her for the conversation and leave the room among puzzled looks from the T.A.T. staff.

The next morning we are waiting at the bus stop. When a con artists wants to accompany us to the closest T.A.T. – presumably for a generous comission, as we now know – we send him on with a grin. The entire trip ended up costing us less than 1500 Baht between the two of us.

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So what is this T.A.T.? And why is it that in Bangkok strange Thais always send you there without you asking for it? Sagesex illuminates. Our first visit to a...